John had stopped drinking again and had been doing fine for about 26 hours. He was already being more productive. Thinking more clearly. Actually enjoying his duties as the president of the Board of his HOA for the first time in a long time.
“Never abandon me,” he interrupted me. “Promise you’ll never abandon me.” I stopped midsentence. “I promise I’ll never abandon you.” I felt his relief and broke eye contact to finish my thought, whatever it was. […]
I went on a yoga retreat in Nicaragua last November where we were served two breakfasts, lunch, and dinner each day in what was referred to as “the restaurant.”
“Ehh crap. I left my wallet in the car.” I said this to the cashier after she’d shuffled all my groceries into two reusable bags. A black one I got at an innovation convention a […]
“Matilda, don’t lay your head back or you’ll choke to death,” Pennie says, trying to wrangle this kid’s squirmy body into an upright eating position in her lap. They give these lame little kids names […]
Lano Seveda. That’s who I am today, according to the QR code on my name tag. I’m exchanging contact information with a guy at a Chief Innovation Officer convention in Times Square, mostly to prove to my manager that I spoke to someone while I’m here, when we discover the mistaken identity.
“Well that’s not right, is it Joey Leslie?” He says my name as he thumbs it into his phone. “Good name!”
I think I am a narcissist. I don’t know many people who aren’t… or perhaps I’ve surrounded myself with people like me who spend too much time in their own heads and can list 10 different items that are actually mirrors in disguise.
The exterior of my office building is covered in them, reflecting the sky and trees and hundreds of zombies that drag one leg from the parking garage down the long stretch of concrete and through a spinning door, into an elevator, up, and into a cube where they slump until feeding time.